So Here's The Deal

I don't have an update yet on the results of the biopsies.  The doctor's office called me this morning to confirm the appointment on Friday, so hopefully the results will be in by then.
I do have an update on how I'm doing.  A lot of people have been asking me how I'm doing these past few days.  Their concern is heart-warming and the prayers are felt and appreciated.  However, up until yesterday, I didn't know how I felt.  I think I've finally figured it out.
My overwhelming emotion is not fear or worry, like you'd expect.  As I mentioned in my other post, I'm not thinking either of these things is life-threatening and I feel like all the doctors I've seen are very competent and aggressive, so there is not that type of worry.  My overwhelming feeling is depression.  In thinking through what the best possible outcome could be on Friday, what could make me happy leaving the office, I decided it would be if I went in there and he said both were benign and that they didn't need to do anything else to treat me and I could go home.  But that's not going to happen.  Even if they are benign, we're still going to have to make decisions regarding surgery risks and I'm still probably going to have to have more tests, more blood work, and more doctor's appointments.  Oh, how I dread that.
I will do a post Friday or Saturday to let you know what I find out.  In the meantime, if you could pray for that depression to lift and my outlook to improve, I would appreciate it.